tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-46666427452208398862024-02-18T19:22:43.212-08:00Queen of This Kingdom!!!!Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.comBlogger193125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-28298556657675203252014-02-27T03:25:00.000-08:002014-02-27T03:28:27.950-08:00You May be Holding the Key <div class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none; mso-pagination: none; text-autospace: none;">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Have you ever wanted to know what was in store
ahead of you, where you would be, what you would be doing? Have you ever
thought to yourself, "I just want this situation to be over?" or
"I don't know how much more of this I can take?" Looking back
over the last three months there is no way I could have expected things to turn
out the way they did.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">As often happens, Rick leaves and I find myself
alone with some time to think and process things and the opportunity to sort
them out enough to write about them, this was the case tonight. I though
perhaps I would go see what I lasted blogged about, because I couldn't remember
when the last time I blogged had been. To my surprise the last blog was
written the week of Thanksgiving 2013, which unbeknownst to me was also the
middle of a huge change that was about to take place in my life.
Ironically, the blog below is a blog where I wrote about coming to the
place where I was going to appreciate me, right where I was. Regardless,
of what others thought about me and how I was treated I committed to myself
that the opinions of others who did not have my best interest at heart would
not control my happiness.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">What am I talking about? Well, as I alluded
to in the post below I was struggling in my professional life. I was
working for someone with no ethics, no leadership skills, and who was so
insecure with herself that she sought to make everyone around her question
their own abilities. Never in all my years as a federal employee had I
ever seen such poor treatment of employees go unchecked and uncorrected.
I struggled with a year of, "How much longer can I put up with
this?" I considered moving back to Hawaii with the kids to find fulfillment
in my career, but in the end did not think it was fair to my husband to take
the last years our youngest son was to live at home away from him. I
looked for other positions within the organization, only to have my boss make
sure those doors got slammed shut with her slanderous words. I thought
about quitting, but in the end refused to give up my career and my time in
federal service all because of someone else, I didn't want her to have that
power over me. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">The week prior to Thanksgiving was an especially
hard week, where the entire management team was accused of things, battered,
abused, and treated poorly. After seeing my boss in the Exchange the
weekend before Thanksgiving and had to deal with more of her negative energy
and nastiness something in me broke. I made the decision that day that I was no
longer going to be treated that way and I was going to use the proper channels
to file an official complaint and let the chips fall where they may. I
realized my own self worth and decided for myself enough was enough. So I
made some calls that weekend, and began to pursue the path of standing up for
myself. What I did not know was that the other managers ALL reached that
breaking point that weekend, and as of Monday morning all of started to file
formal complaints. What we all did not know was that our boss for all intents
and purposes had quit that week, without knowing we all had reached our
breaking points, she reached hers and quit. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">What I find so powerful in all of this is that it
was not until all the managers, these talented professional women who had
struggled with being beat down verbally and emotionally for a year all reached
their breaking point that the struggle was broken in the work place. It
wasn't until we all decided that we were valuable and worth more than we were
getting, until we decided that enough was enough that things changed.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">It wasn't until I decided in my mind, heart, and
soul that I would not allow myself to be treated this way that my breakthrough
came.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;">Since, that moment I have worked some of the
longest hours of my career as the remaining three managers struggled to keep
the programs running in the absence of three managers. However, even on
the longest days, we were happier than we had been in a year. Things have
shifted for not just those who reached their breaking point and decided enough
is enough, but the organization as a whole is benefitting from being free to
enjoy their work environment as professionals. We all have new positions,
and have found that we really like each other and we are an awesome team.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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are the ones to hold the key to change in our lives. Certain situations
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and do something about it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt;">Ask
yourself, what situation are you holding the key to in your life?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-36020605285470370202013-11-27T13:44:00.000-08:002013-11-27T13:44:18.559-08:00I Am Thankful for Me!
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">Yes, my title says I am thankful for me! This
last year has been trying but has taught me so much about myself and life.
I have learned to value myself, not in a puffed up look at me way, but in
a way that allows me to understand my own worth and protect myself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16pt;">As women we tend to buy into the Pnterest, DIY, and
latest fitness hype of the day. Now, I am not saying any of those things
are bad or harmful, but when we begin comparing ourselves to them we fall into
a trap. Think about it...you are surfing through Pinterest and you see
all these amazing ideas and can't wait to try them for your holiday party.
You start making lists and gathering items and you are ready to go.
But then life happens and you don't have the time to get it all done or
your glue won't do the things that the Pinterest glue does and BAM! You
start asking yourself why you can't get it done like the people on Pinterest.
Well ladies here's a news flash for you...all those items on Pinterest
were put on there by THOUSANDS of people. So you as an individual are
trying to be all Pinterest or Martha Stewart when both of them have thousands
of people working their stuff! Slow down decide what matters and focus on
that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">This year has been a professional struggle for me.
I am going to type into words what I have been saying to myself for
several months...Jill you should be ashamed of yourself! I have been
married to an active duty submariner for 24 years and have dealt with
deployments, separation, long working hours, and being a single parent.
BUT I have never had to deal with the frustration of moving every three
years and the effect it can have on your career. I was spoiled and lived
in the same place for 22 of those years and was able to build a solid
reputation and name for myself in my field. I never struggled having to
find a job; I simply applied for them and got them. I never had to
struggle to re-establish my career and my reputation. Well, this last
year I was able to experience just that and I found out it sucks!
However, even in the suckage (its my blog I can make up words:)) I have learned
a valuable lesson...to value myself and not to allow others to dictate my worth
in both my own mind and in the work place. I had to spend countless hours
praying, encouraging myself, and getting tongue lashings from those who love me
to keep a grasp on who I am and my professional value. The truth is you
really can't make people accept your value professionally...but you can hold on
to your worth with both hands for yourself. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">Another lesson learned this year comes from a blog
I wrote a couple of months ago..."Don't Put Poop in Your Pocket."
And I will be honest some days when I use that saying I use the word
poop...other days its the naughty word for poop...because man....its bad poop!
But the gist of it is people leave crap all over....gossip, lies, anger,
jealousy...you name it, but you don't have to latch on to it and make it yours.
You can simply chose to leave it where it is and not accept all the
negativity they are trying to share with the world. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">The final lesson of the year is the common thread
in all three of the above lessons...YOU control what you think, feel, and allow
into your life. Value yourself enough to throw out the trash of life and hold
tightly to what you value. Ladies, I promise you it is ok to love you,
appreciate you, and be thankful for the person you were, are, and will be!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">Happy Thanksgiving!</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-62792665392807899952013-11-08T14:21:00.001-08:002013-11-08T14:21:39.888-08:00Veterans Day 2013
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Shhhhhh!!!!! It’s early in the morning on the Saturday of
Veteran’s Day weekend and I am enjoying not only the peace and quiet, but the
feeling of completeness that comes from knowing your husband is home from sea.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Veterans Day weekend, sadly like Memorial Day and 4<sup>th</sup>
of July are often just thought of as a day off by most Americans. For those who serve, have served, and ever
loved anyone who served these are days where reflection and honoring come before
BBQ’s, parades, and fireworks.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Personally, I live a life of honor and reflection, grateful
for the sacrifices daily that the service men and women have made, are making,
and will continue to make. Living,
working, and spending almost every waking moment on a military base will do
that to a person. Add to that the fact
that I am supporting my husband as he lives a life of sacrifice, as are my
children, and it’s easy to understand when I say live a life of honor,
reflection, and gratefulness that I mean it as a verb, an action.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I am given the opportunity daily to honor the service of our
active duty members as I strive to provide them with excellent childcare as the
CDC Director. Our team works to make
sure that they can go to work knowing not only that their children are safe,
but they are loved and happy. I am
provided the opportunity twice a day to reflect on the sacrifice and gift that
those who serve have given, are giving, and will give as I hear Colors twice a
day and I pause, and reflect. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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I am also grateful daily for those who serve, as I witness
them daily working to serve their country.
I witness the gate guards serving as sentries to the base; I see the
medical staff at the hospital serving active duty members and their
families. I am blessed to drive down the
pier and see submarines ready and willing to go into harms way. I am witness to the tears of sorrow as a
submarine pulls out of port, tears of frustration as moms and children work to
find their grove while dad is gone, and tears of joy when that submarine comes
through the harbor and makes her way back to the pier. I am
in the thick of honor, courage, and commitment daily, I am fortunate enough to
witness sacrifice in action. So I have an unfair advantage over most American’s,
because I see daily sacrifice in action, rather than just a news clip here or
there. I am grateful for the life I have
been blessed to live as part of such an amazing group of men and women. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-24581846209702279312013-10-28T22:57:00.003-07:002013-10-28T22:57:22.258-07:00My Anchor
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My current life situation has me feeling a bit adrift and
since I have been meaning to write about the anchor’s symbolism for some time,
today seems like as good a day as any to delve into this blog.<o:p></o:p></div>
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For many years the anchor has been a symbol of honor, courage,
and commitment in my life. It has
symbolized the way we have committed to serving and living. However, recently as I have begun to
contemplate a tattoo (perhaps a mid-life crisis) the anchor has been the choice
I keep coming back to. I have considered
going completely CPO in my theme, but for some reason I have shied away from
making that move. <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Several recent experiences have left me feeling a bit like I
was being tossed around in the water and I began to think of the anchor in a
different light. I began to see the
anchor as a tool used to keep you from drifting and being destroyed in the
storm, as a place of safety and security.<o:p></o:p></div>
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There have been many times in my husbands naval career that I
have fought to stay grounded and sought refuge from the storm crashing around
me. I will never forget the day I found
out my husbands submarine had been on its way out of the Gulf, when she was
turned around and sent back in. The end
of an already long seven month deployment, homecoming, and the ships safety had
been within arms reach, and then it was taken.
That morning at early Morning Prayer, our Pastor taught a lesson on
Proverbs 24:10 <span class="textprov-24-10"><i>If</i> you faint in the day of
adversity,</span> <span class="textprov-24-10">Your strength <i>is</i> small.
This scripture immediately sunk into my spirit and gave me the will and
strength to fight to stay afloat for my own sanity and the well-being of my
children. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="textprov-24-10"><br /></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="textprov-24-10">There have been several times since
then that I have clung to this scripture, refusing to have small strength
because I felt that if my strength was indeed small I would fail those who were
depending on me to keep it together, those who were looking at me for
answers. Fear that if I gave into the
feelings of despair and let my strength be weak, I may never return.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="textprov-24-10"><br /></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="textprov-24-10">Where did the strength come from, you
may ask? It came from my relationship
with God, from my faith that He was in control of the situation and all I had
to do was remain strong and focused on what He had told me, versus focusing on
the chaos around me. He must be my anchor; He must be the shelter in the storm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span class="textprov-24-10"><br /></span></div>
<div class="line">
<span class="textprov-24-10">So, I have decided that my tattoo will
indeed be the fouled naval anchor, but rather than honor, courage, and
commitment it will say, “Refuse to Sink” and this will be a constant reminder
that my strength will not be weak in my days of adversity, as long as I make
sure that the anchor which keeps me safe from the storm is God. </span><o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--EndFragment-->Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-36715448398462629132013-09-12T03:01:00.001-07:002013-09-12T03:02:07.700-07:00The Reality of Living With Teenage Sons<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/h1mKmTYBF-8" width="480"></iframe><br />
<br />
I am giving you a warning before you push the play button. This video clip is completely unsuitable for children and people who cannot deal with vulgarity and yes a little nudity. However, this is the reality of living with two grown sons...which is completely unsuitable for any sane parent, never mind a mom who is at least a foot shorter than both her sons...who must deal with insanity such as this on her own.<br />
<br />
I promise you there are days when I can't beleive the insanity of their words and actions, throw in the lack of any rational thought with alot of physical action and the result is unbelievable. Tonight the arguement was about who was going to sit at the breakfast bar, because apparently the six foot long space is not big enough for both of them. So as the arguement progressed I heard the cries of," MOMMMMM" I made a choice to ignore my very large toddlers who are arguing over the breakfast bar...I am not going down that road tonight. Next thing I know they are each trying to tattle that the other one mooned them...and then comes the flashing of their manhood at each other....all while telling me play by play what the other one is doing. I finally snap and yell, " I don't care what body part you show each other...I DON"T CARE!!!!" <br />
<br />
But the reality of it is that if I do not send them both to their room for the night or if I am not home, the scene will play out much like the hot mess in the video clip. Where in the ham sandwhich does such irrational, competitive, craziness come from. How do two supposed sane human beings think its ok to act like this? How do two people who were raised by responsible morally sound people come to this? They know better.<br />
<br />
And I promise you it is a game to them...the aggravator takes great joy in terrorizing their victim. You can see the glee in their eye as the victim realizes that someone has touched their drum set, football, cleat, earphones, cup, mouth guard...nothing is sacred. The the victim then becomes the aggravator and the aggravator becomes the vicitm and has the nerve to be offended at the offense inflicted on him. And the cycle continues. One of them actually asked me if I was going to do something about what his brother just did and when I said no actually said to me, "You arent't going to do anything about it?" My response was you just spent twently minutes aggravating him...how about we start with you!?!?! And I walked away.<br />
<br />
I am sorry if the video offends anyone, but seriously I have no words to explain the daily struggle of living with the two Marini brothers amd this video is the closest thing I have ever witnessed that even comes close.<br />
<br />
Is it Homecoming time yet?!?!?!<br />
<br />
<br />Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-19973692631154440962013-08-28T23:31:00.003-07:002013-08-29T03:44:15.066-07:00I Have Gone Gangster!<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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<br />
<span lang="EN">Being the parent of teenagers is
not a job for those weak at heart. Your
constant battle to ensure that they are making good life choices, while dealing
with their evolving need to discover who they are a part from you, their
parents, and the influence of their peers and society can exhaust you mentally
and physically. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN">Last night my youngest son
accused me of bribery, because I reminded him that his attitude is directly
linked to the purchase and delivery of the extra football equipment he
desired. He chooses to see my rewarding
his good behavior as bribery, which tells me that without the rewards the
behavior would be less than desirable. As I lay there trying to fall asleep,
fuming that he just doesn’t get it, and pissed at his attitude concerning the
direct linkage of attitude to rewards I went off the beaten path a bit. I began
to think of famous mobsters and how my son would feel if I was a real old
school mobster using bribery to exhort the behavior I wanted from him.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN">Being the history dork that I am
I got up this morning and began Googling famous mobsters, and I stumbled upon a
site that broke them down by geographical regions and cities. So, with Rick being stationed on the USS
Chicago my first stop was Chicago and boy did I hit the jackpot! Chicago is where the world famous Al Capone
ruled and raised havoc.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<br />
<span lang="EN">Capone is credited with being the
smuggling and bootlegging of liquor during prohibition. While I can’t honestly say that I have any
bootlegging qualities I was drawn to Capone’s wide spread influence and ability
to know what is going on in all areas of his territory, while never leaving his
headquarters. Capone had moles which reported the goings on in the city to him.
Although no conviction was ever made Capone was credited with the Saint Valentines
Day Massacre in which several famous mobsters were shot down execution style in
broad day light in the Lincoln Park neighborhood of the North Side of Chicago
on Valentines Day in 1929. Now, I chose
to focus on the method behind the shooting rather than the actual
violence. You see, Capone’s men set up a
look out or stake out if you will across the street from a warehouse to monitor
their rivals activities. This allowed them to know what was going on with their
rivals and coordinate the massacre. This
is what I would like to focus on, my ability to monitor and coordinate the shut
down of any activity in the lives of my children that is undesirable. While I wouldn’t call them moles or informants
but living on a small military base in Guam and working for MWR and being
married to a Chief of the Boat on the waterfront allows be to be in a position
to gather information on what, where, and when my children are doing
something. Most often I do not have to solicit
this information and it falls into my lap, allowing me to have a clear picture
of what is going on with my children.
This also gives me an opportunity to ensure that those who have contact
or influence over my children during the day are aware of my expectations. Have I also mentioned that I can see Guam
High from my office window and that several of the faculty and staff at the
high school have children at my center?
Yes, I know all that happens with my children in Guam. This influence also extends across the
Pacific to my daughters, where there truly may be some type of mafia network
involved, which will remain undiscussed to protect the innocent. Yes, I know
what is going on over there in the land of Aloha; just call it the Capone in my
history.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN">However, there was another
mobster that I found to be more to my liking simply because he was smarter and
less violent that the famous Capone. Fellow mobster Ricca said this of him,
“"Accardo had more brains for breakfast than Capone had in a
lifetime." Because of his wisdom, ability to stay under the radar, and
even tempered personality he did minimal jail time and lived a much longer life
than Capone. This would be Tony Accardo, known as Antonino or Joe Batters.
Antonino rose from a petty thief to be Outfit Authority in 1972. He is credited with saving Capone’s life more
than once and is said to have taken part in the Saint Valentines Day massacre. In his personal life he married and remained
ever faithful to a Polish American girl and his grandson is Eric Kumerow who
was drafted to NFL, these things right here endeared me to him, but his calm
low profile and ability to get the job done were the real draw for me.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN">Known for his extortion abilities
Antonino was able to make people do what he wanted. This is the ability that I most desire and
not for my own gain or evil purposes. I
don’t want this ability to rule the world or take things from others that do
not belong to me, no; I want this ability to make my children make good
choices, do what is asked of them the first time I ask and without any lip. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN">And I use the opposite leverage
than my pal Antonino used, I use positive reinforcement rather than the
negative of broken knee caps. I offer
the land of milk and honey so to speak.
I offer the extra gifts and things that my children want. The color coded gloves, cleats, socks, and
extra football paraphernalia. The extra
cash to go to the movies, the extra cash to go to the mall, the extra
electronic device, the things they don’t have to have, but seem to want. This is what I offer for those who wish to
fall prey to my extortion, those who wish to listen to my words the first time
they come out of my mouth, for those who do what needs to be done before I ask,
for those who are brave enough to clean up after themselves. I offer these
things to the few, the proud, and the brave. I offer a life with no nagging or
threats, a life without constant reminders to flush the damn toilet and to stop
calling your brother names. I offer the
Mary Poppins of extortion to my children and they refuse the offer I have made
and to me it’s an offer they can’t refuse.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span lang="EN"><br /></span>
<span lang="EN">According to dictionary.com, the
definition that fits my type of bribery is the second version of the noun bribe
which is, “</span>anything given or
serving to persuade or induce.” Now there is a first version which is the
version my son implies that I am subjecting him to which is used to persuade
the corruption of an individual, however, the version applicable to my form is
the one which desires to persuade my children to make positive life
choices. So call me one who bribes son…I
am in good company! <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
Now….I just need a good mobster
name….<span lang="EN"><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<!--EndFragment-->Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-29097946600450346482013-08-07T22:21:00.000-07:002013-08-07T22:21:15.447-07:00Do You Have Poop In Your Pocket?<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Have you ever thought that there was entirely too much drama and negativity in your life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Have you ever looked for the source of that drama?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Was it an eye opening experience?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Did you discover some things about yourself?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Recently, I had this experience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I was so over all the negativity and drama that I THOUGHT was created by others in my life. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought all the actions and dramatic Facebook status’s were the source of my frustration. ,that the rumors and the talk of the town started by others was the source.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
However, as I began to dig a little deeper and really think about it, others are not responsible for the drama I allow into my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I chose to allow those people to be my friends on Facebook, and I read all the negativity and drama they post, and absorb it into my life and mind, then I AM accountable and responsible for the drama in my life. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>If I allow the rumors and what others say and think of me to invade my thoughts and attitude , then I AM responsible for the drama and negativity in my life.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
You see there will always be immature people in the world, people who have nothing better to do than create drama and chaos wherever they go.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>They will always relish in stirring the pot of discontention then stand back and watch the drama unfold like All My Children on television. There will always be people who are unhappy with themselves and their lives, who will seek to point out the strengths in others that they wish they had, as something negative or weak. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>However, only you are responsible for what you allow into your mind and thoughts.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
You do not have to be friends on Facebook with those people, you do not have to subscribe to their version of Gossip Digest, allowing what they say about you to frustrate you. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>You do not have to allow their behavior to irritate you. You can however, guard your heart and mind ensuring that you do not take their immaturity and misguided social paths of destruction on as negativity in your life.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br />Simply unfriend them on Facebook and realize that you have the power to release YOURSELF from the negativity and drama. The question is will you?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I have I have deleted all the drama off of my facebook page, after all my Facebook page is for me to connect with people I like, to socialize with those I value in my life, not for others to drop crap into my life.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I refuse to be moved by the ugly of others, I have found peace in my new found freedom. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
Look at it this way…if there was a pile of feces on the sidewalk, would you pick it up, put it in your pocket, and allow it to stink up your life?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I would hope not.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Then why would you allow someone else’s ugly to stink up your life?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<br /></div>
Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-29464724687425549212013-08-02T04:38:00.000-07:002013-08-02T04:38:15.912-07:00Snap Shots of a Year
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">Here I sit on a Friday night, listening to four
teenage boys in the living room playing video games, working on moving years
worth of pictures from my old lap top to a hard drive and my mac book. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16pt;">It must be done and I have put it off for well over
a year. I knew I needed to relocate the pictures before the laptop
finally gave up the ghost, and today I was looking for pictures from a CPO
event in early 2012, so I figured I would kill two birds with one stone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16pt;">Anyone who knows me will tell you that I take
entirely too many pictures, and today I realize this more than ever. I
have 20 pictures of my kids in almost the same pose because I put that camera
on sports mode and go for broke, always in search of the priceless picture.
It annoys me when I have to search through the countless photos to
picture the perfect one.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">However, today as I worked on transferring the
final months of 2011 and the beginning of 2012, I am grateful for every picture
I took during this time. The reason for this is that if it were not for
these pictures I would not have one lucid memory of this time period. I
was so emotionally crippled by the loss of my mother I in no way filed these
memories in my memory bank. Now you can look at these pictures and see my
physical presence and even my smile, but I cannot without the aid of these
photographs remember these events.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 16pt;">As I look back over the photos I am grateful that I
have them, and I am again reminded first of the impact that such a loss can
have on your life, and second how your mind and heart protect themselves when
you go into crisis mode. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">It also causes me to think, what other life events
I might have missed out of because of my grief, or during other times when I was
carrying some stress or emotionally challenging situation. Do I have
pictures of every little thing that I missed? Thinking of how precious
life is and how easy it can be overlooked because of extenuating circumstance
that affect on how you see your surroundings.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">Looking particularly at the photos we took the week
of my mom’s funeral, you can see the strain on our faces, even in the
smiles. Some may find the photos of us
at my Uncle Bobby’s lake shooting guns a bit strange for my family. However, they tell a story. From the first picture where you see my
sister and niece walking down the road to the lake to the last group photo, you
see my family’s strength and perseverance.
You see my Uncle Bobbie and Aunt Kris are my parents closest friends and
my Uncle took my mom’s passing very hard, and he was amazing in knowing that my
family needed to get out of the house.
He knew that the break from death was what we needed. That we needed an activity that would
encompass us all, that would get us together outside away from the stress and
pain of grief. So he loaded us all up,
drove us to the forest, and gave us guns!
And it worked….we all shot that gun from the youngest to oldest. We bonded and laughed over bullets and
targets, we took deep breaths of fresh air, and we felt a little something
outside of grief. The whole week was the
longest of my life, but also the most amazing.
I love the people in those pictures with my whole heart and I am
thankful for the strength and unity that you see in those photos. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span style="font-size: 16pt;">I am thankful tonight for my almost unexplainable desire to have my
camera every where I go taking pictures of everyday occurrences, because
without that desire I would have totally lost a year of my life</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<!--EndFragment-->.Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-40369251932577863902013-07-20T18:05:00.001-07:002013-07-20T18:05:26.145-07:00Seasons<h3 style="background-color: white; color: #5c1101; font-family: Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px; margin: 0px;">
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<!--StartFragment-->
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="color: #470d00; font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Ecclesiastes<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Times; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Times;"> 3:1-8 <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">There is a time for everything, </span><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> and</span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"> a
season for every activity under the heavens:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">2 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">A
time to be born and a time to die, </span><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> a</span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"> time
to plant and a time to uproot,</span><b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">3 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time to kill and a time to heal, </span><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time to tear down and a time to build,</span><b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">4 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">5 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
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time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,</span><b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">6 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a time
to search and a time to give up, </span><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time to keep and a time to throw away,</span><b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">7 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time to tear and a time to mend, </span><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time to be silent and a time to speak,</span><b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">8 <o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time to love and a time to hate, </span><span style="font-family: Courier; font-size: 7.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Courier;"> </span><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">a
time for war and a time for peace.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">I promise I know God's word is true and you can
read a passage a thousand times in your life and one time it may not touch your
heart, another time it may correct you, and yet another it may heal you.
It never ceases to amaze me how the Word can be right on time every time
to everyone.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">The above scripture spoke to my heart this
morning, as I was reflecting on Becca leaving for college (to be honest I think
of little else). I came to two conclusions that brought me this scripture.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">The first being that even though I already have a
child that lives all the way across the ocean from Guam in Hawaii I am facing
Becca leaving with a great deal of emotion. It has occurred to me that
normally when your first child goes off to college you begin a season in your
life of transition from having all your children living at home to the
beginning of the empty nest season of your life. My transition from one season
of my life to the next should have began last year, however, my life was in
such an emotional and physical upheaval with the passing of my mom, the move to
Guam, Joshua graduating from high school, and Brittany moving out all of my
emotions and transitions ran together and just caused me to be overwhelmed to
the point where none of them were allowed to work them selves out or for the
transitions to occur. Through out the last year they have become
unraveled (as I have:-)) and started to work themselves out. But this
final one has proven itself to be most painful.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Maybe it's because she is my youngest daughter and
her leaving will leave me the sole female in the house of testosterone.
Maybe its because she understands me like none of my other children. But
mostly its because I have began a monumental transition in my life. I am
entering a new season, a bit behind schedule, but as the Word says there is a
time for each season in our lives. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">The arrival of her flight itinerary to Hawaii
caused a night of tears and sleeplessness. All night as I sobbed I ran a
running picture show in my mind of her childhood and all of the things we did
or did not do. Did I prepare her enough to be independent? Did she
feel loved and supported everyday of her life? Is she ready? How am
I going to walk away from her at that airport and let her get on that plane
that will carry her thousands of miles and an ocean away from me? Who will take
care of her if she is sick? All of these thoughts ran through my head as
tears ran down my face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">But this morning I am faced with the Truth, that
this season was promised to me when I was born, when they were born, and when
they give birth to their own children it will live on. That this is
ordained to be and that it is a good, natural, and healthy thing. I will
find my victory and healing in this and the fact that my God is her God and He
has made her a promise in Jeremiah 29:11 </span><b><span style="font-family: Verdana; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">1 </span></b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">For I know the
plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you
and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Not only has
God promised me I will have seasons in my life, but He has made her promises
that He intends to keep. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 16.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Verdana;">Now I promise you I am still going to cry for the
next couple of weeks, but as the scripture says there is a time for my tears
and they will not last forever, they will simply serve as a tool that will
assist me in transitioning from one season to another.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<!--EndFragment--></h3>
Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-20456797386099593962012-12-23T16:52:00.001-08:002012-12-23T16:53:08.199-08:00Christmas Returns<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Above you see several pictures of my family making Christmas cookies, not really a big deal to most. However, for me this year it is a milestone. You see there are many memories that stick out from my childhood, but the annual cookie making events with my mom and her sister shine above the rest. It was an event that we looked forward to each year with great anticipation. My brother Ron, sisters Nicole and Amy, and cousin Dawn would make cut outs for what seemed like hours, then we would race off to weak havoc somewhere (usually outside in the snow) until it was time to decorate cookies. It seems that this one thing brought us together as a family like nothing else. As I grew up and had a family of my own I ensured that cookie making was a part of our annual family Christmas tradition. We faithfully made cookies to share with those we love. Last year I bought all the ingredients to make cookies and fully intended to carry out the tradition which had been handed down to me. However, the ingredients sat in the cupboard (so many ingredients that when we moved to Guam and gave all the items in our pantry to our neighbors they asked if we were starting a bakery.) and the kids continually asked when we were going to make cookies. Last year was my first Christmas without my mom, as she passed in October last year. Sure I had lived away from home and had not made cookies physically with my mom for over twenty years, but she was a phone call away each year when I called for the recipes yet again. Yes, they were in my cook book, but I wanted them from my mom:-) Last year the cookies didn't get made and Christmas was a little pitiful, I just couldn't bring myself to celebrate admist the lost. <br />
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This year however, I have made it far enough in my grieving process to make cookies with my children, over decorate my house, and celebrate with family and friends. I did cry as I made the first batch and Rick was there to hold me and pat my back. But I wanted to make Christmas cookies and I wanted to celebrate Christmas, so that is a milestone. I will forever be grateful for parents who took the time to instill family traditions and loved us. As we continue to pass these traditions on and create new ones, we will forever hold my mom and the children's Nana in our hearts.Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-18731008004817524512012-09-29T06:39:00.000-07:002012-09-29T06:39:06.434-07:00The Journey Part 2The last post was the logistics and mechanics of what occurred, the facts so to speak. However, this second post contains no facts and serves to let those of you who have walked through this last year with me an inside look and an explanation of where I was. It also serves as part of the healing process for me, and hopefully for someone else.<br />
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The fact that it is three days before the anniversary of my mom's passing doesn't make it time for me to share this, or take the next step in the healing process. I think I am just ready to deal with it, or maybe life is giving me time to deal with it. I'm not sure.<br />
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You see I returned to Hawaii the day before my birthday, and returned to work the day after that. I did not want to return to work, I wanted to crawl in my bed and stay there. I was done being strong for everyone and I was in my home where I could grieve in peace. However, I had this amazing TEAM in Hawaii who while I was at home for my mothers funeral made the move that we had been planning for, for 12 months from one Child Development Center to another. They were able to complete the move and I owed it to them to be there. Once I got there they really didn't know what to do with me, nor do I remember what I did that day or for the next week or two. At one point my boss, who I love, but didn't know how to deal with what she needed from me versus what I needed told me that she had let me have my time and she needed me to get it together. I don't fault her because she just didn't know what to do or say to help me, and she wasn't able to say that, so instead she told me to get it together. Anyone who has worked in that environment knows exactly how stressful and demanding it is. There were days I didn't think I was going to make it. Between the grief and stress, I felt like each breath was a struggle. But still because of who I am, I kept on trucking. Making sure that everything was taken care of. I struggled to listen to people who were lying about why they couldn't come to work, as I sat there a hot mess. There were days I would wonder if anybody really saw me and what was going on? Did they not see that everyday was a struggle?<br />
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I shut down and did not let anyone but my husband and a select few in. I did not have the energy to give others what they wanted from me. I did not want to have to encourage them in my grief, I did not want to encourage them that I would be all right. I just wanted to be left in peace, in the precious little time I had to myself. I offended some, not because I was mean or rude, but because I wouldn't let them in. So on top of the grief, I now had to deal with hurting those who were only trying to help me. But again I did not have it in me to give out to them. I don't blame them for their hurt, but I wish they could have seen that I needed them to support me in grieving and not make it about what they wanted to give me.<br />
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I refused to spend the Thanksgiving holiday at home, sitting at a table, eating turkey. I wanted no traditions, no warm fuzzies, none of the trimmings. Instead we went camping and fried a turkey in the woods. Thank God for Mike and Carolyn who let me cry when I needed to and laugh when I needed to. I began December by buying all the things I would need to make our regular Christmas cookies. I really wanted to because that was Mom's thing. But I couldn't do it, I tried mom, but I couldn't do it. We spent Christmas Day with Mike and Carolyn and again I am thankful for their unconditional acceptance of my grief and how I chose to grieve.<br />
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Christmas came and went and the new year began. At this point I thought to myself now I will be able to deal with all these feelings and work through my grief. I thought the first holiday season was over, we had a couple of months before Joshua graduates, things are going to slow down and I will be able to deal with things. However, a week into the new year brought orders to Guam. I now had a house to get ready to rent, over seas physicals to complete, children to get ready for transition, cars and household goods to ship, getting my TEAM ready for me to leave, looking for a new job, and saying good bye to those I love. So I spent the next five and a half months getting ready to move.<br />
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I will not lie, I spent everyday the week of Mother's Day crying, at work, at home, in the car, everywhere I went. Coming back to my job...there was an incident that caused me to have to make some tough decisions at work. I made a decision that caused a women who I thought was one of the ones I could count on, someone who would not have chosen the week of my first mothers day without my mom to retaliate to something I was required to do. This combined with the fact that it was my first mothers day without my mom, and the stress of moving and having a child graduate from high school and leaving a child in Hawaii made that week the hardest of my life. I spent Mother's Day weekend painting the upstairs doors and door frames of our home, crying the entire time. Again, thanks to my wonderful husband and Mike and Carolyn I made it through the weekend. They let me grieve, didn't try to fix me, they just loved me, the way I needed to be loved.<br />
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Next came saying good bye to all those that I love in Hawaii and leaving Brittany there. We flew to Rhode Island and spent two weeks in school, said good bye to all those we loved there, and got on a flight to Guam. I had six days to get used to living somewhere else before I started work and my husband left. Since then he has come and gone again, I finished my masters, and today completed a transition from being a contractor to a government employee again. I think I am ready to deal with my grief.<br />
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I remember on Mother's Day asking how do you even have Mother's Day when you don't have a mom? A couple of weeks ago I was talking about the first time I saw the Thriller video. It was my mom who arranged for our Girl Scout troop to see the video together for the first time. It was my mom who went on countless Girl Scout camping trips with us, who ran how many years of cookie sales, who was at every sporting event we ever had. I can't believe that she really is gone. I can't believe that the one who gave birth to me is no longer here.<br />
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Everyone's grieving process is different and there is no formula. I think for me the biggest struggle was that people were used to me being strong, being able to deal with large amounts of stress, and making it through. What they didn't know was that the humor and strength I needed to make it through was deficient, that I had nothing to give out. I am no where close to being done grieving and suspect that I have some more ugly cries in my future over the loss of my mother, but writing this is a huge step for me.<br />
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<br />Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-60375461980938308672012-09-29T05:33:00.001-07:002012-09-29T05:33:28.965-07:00The Journey Part 1I have known that the day to write this blog was coming for almost a year now. It's not the physical time that has passed that makes it the time to write this blog but more of a milestone on the map of the emotional journey that grief has taken me on. <br />
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Having spent the last twenty four years as a military spouse stationed over five thousand miles away from home, I knew that inevitably there would come a telephone call that would change my life as I knew it. The cycle of life and tragedies are part of every one's life and there is no escaping them, try as we might. As a military dependent I was sensitive to those around me who received life altering news from home, and being human would wonder how when it came that news would affect me. Now I know all the wondering in the world cannot prepare you when it comes.<br />
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One year ago today I was told that they did not expect my mother to make it through the next three or four days and that I needed to get my family on an airplane and get from Honolulu, Hawaii to Buffalo, NY as soon as possible. Having the amazing husband that I have and SUBPAC Pearl Harbor being as wonderful as they are allowed my family to be in the air within four hours. No small feat since the end of the fiscal year money had already been shift to the new fiscal year accounts.<br />
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I remember getting on the airplane, with all of us scattered all over the plane and Brittany waiting in Honolulu for the next flight out. As the plane began to taxi and I had a chance to fully absorb all that was happening since that phone call came, I cannot tell a lie, I completely lost it. God had so graciously made sure that an Army Casualty Officer was sitting next to me, and was able to calm me down until Rick could work with the attendants to get my seat moved next to him. Once I hit the seat next to him I can honestly say that I don't remember the rest of the flight. <br />
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I remember touching down in Buffalo, NY and driving straight to the hospital. I know it was cold, but I don't remember. All I remember is walking in there and seeing my mother lying in the hospital bed. Prior to me getting out of Honolulu the doctor had shared with me that my mother had signed multiple documents to ensure that there would be no life support systems or life saving measures used. However, at the families request in her unconscious state the Hospice workers agreed with the family to assist her with receiving oxygen until we could all get there. Once we got Britt from the airport that evening my Dad, brother Ron my sisters Nicole and Amy, Britt, and Rick and I went to spend the night at the hospital. <br />
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This was Friday and at this point we had already been to the hospital twice, this being the third time. Every time we went we had to work through the shock of seeing her there, not speaking, not awake. Once we worked through that we would settle into a quiet, sad sort of groove with the natural jokes we have as a family. Then when it was time to leave we it was time to say goodbye to mom because we didn't know if we would ever have the chance again. This was emotionally draining and took all the energy I had, At this point there are days I am so tired, I swear I haven't recovered from it. It was at this time that Rick kept us focused. We had made an agreement that no one would be with mom by themselves, while the others left. We agreed that we would go in the morning, afternoon, and evening as a group. We would rest and eat in between. I am so thankful for my husband during those times when we considered staying all day or night. He reminded us of what we agreed to and was there to ensure that the doctors and nurses understood our concerns and supported all of us. I have to say I have an amazing family. My sister in law Jenn made sure we ate and had clean clothes, my brother in law Ben had kid duty, and my brother in law Tony made sure we had breakfast and coffee every morning. Despite the circumstances it was my family at its absolute best.<br />
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The morning my mom passed we went to go see her and did what we had been doing. Spent time with her and said good bye. The rest of the family was watching the Bills play because that's what mom would have wanted and Rick and I ran to the store. We were standing in the cold medicine aisle when Rick's phone rang. He took my basket out of my hands, put it on the floor, and led me out of the store and I knew. I knew that my mom was gone.<br />
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<br />Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-64360249735223530582012-09-05T23:29:00.001-07:002012-09-05T23:33:33.875-07:00New Blog:-)So much has happened in the last several years...months...I can't keep track of how long it has been. I have so much to write about, work through, write about...But I need to be able to Blog about other areas of my life while I figure this mystery out. So I started a new blog...Sub Wife Sub Life Check it out http://subwifesublife.blogspot.comJill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-30510304564762842472011-04-20T13:31:00.000-07:002011-04-20T14:13:56.000-07:00Mid Life Crisis???Aloha friends!<br /><br />All these years I used to think that the term midlife crisis was simply a title people who were in their <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">forties</span> would use to describe a bad decision and was basically a bunch of bunk! However, as a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">forty</span> year old wife of a Senior Chief who is a <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">CMC</span>, mother of four teenagers, Director of a CDC, and Director of the Children's ministry who is also working on her Masters...I believe it is true!<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">OMG</span>!!! With all the stress and pressure I have in my life right now I feel like I just may lose my mind (<span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">although</span> I refuse to lose the mind of Christ) Let's see where do I begin? Well we are up for orders again...well we really aren't...but have been given a harsh nudge in the direction of picking a boat, as there is going to be a major shifting of senior leadership here on the waterfront beginning at the Force Master Chief and working its way down. This means that there are going to be several COB billets opening up on the waterfront, and they are going to need them filled. So we begin the process of having to choose a boat to be our family for three years. Those of you who have been following me for years, or are close friends know that this is no easy task....for Rick....he checks the schedule, the crew, the upcoming changes in command...and a whole host of other things that he will review. He will change his mind at least 400 times, making all of us crazy. Oh, and let me add that now he is also scrambling to finish his Bachelors before he goes to another command...which means he is cramming way to much homework into a small window. All while attempting to complete all the projects in the house he wanted to complete before he was <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">deployable</span>. I have begun to hate Home Depot!<br /><br />Four teenagers...I have no idea where to begin on that one! Brittany is doing really well in college...after a rough start and the possibility of loosing her scholarship and she loves her job. However, she is struggling with passing her road test! Three times and still no luck! Joshua turned 17 Monday and Rick refuses to let him get his license until he shows some maturity (<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">ummm</span>...does this mean I should revoke Rick's license???) He has a job...at Mom's Soul Food Kitchen...the white boy is cooking your soul food:-) He is faithful to his responsibilities <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">to</span> include the Usher Board, his job, school, and of course his beloved football! I really am proud of how he is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">committed</span> and responsible to the things in his life...I just wish he would be nice to the people he lives with. He is so incredibly grouchy! The alarming thing is that he really is not engaged in this whole I am graduating from high school in a year thing...so I am going to have to take the reigns on that one...because I refuse to have him at home everyday playing <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Xbox</span> in his underwear! Becca is very passionate about REAL an <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">anti-tobacco</span> movement and speaks in the senate to the representatives of Hawaii and does interviews for local news shows. Zachary is still playing football..tackle...flag does not matter to him. He was in the symphonic band but gave up on it.<br /><br />All of the above have one thing in common....they need a ride where ever they go. They take the bus every once in a while but for the most part I am their driver! Add to that the stress of raising four people who are starting to spread their wings and want their independence...but still need guidance...guidance they <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">don't</span> want. Don't forget to throw in a Senior Chief that would like to see our home run like a submarine...and his children to act and listen like his adult sailors do....this is a recipe for disaster my friends. Most days I feel like a a referee!!!<br /><br />I love my job....but the Good Lord knows that there are days where people take me to the edge of the brink. Working within the military community has its challenges...we are undergoing major budget cuts and deployments, the whole lifestyle is extremely stressful and that stress comes out in different forms...often times we see it as when we are getting screamed at when we ask a parent to pick a sick child up, or we enforce a major regulation...we try not to take it personally...but after so many times in the day it starts to wear on you. We are also renovating our building. This means I have to move all of my staff and children to another building for six months. Sounds like fun, doesn't it? Well, in doing this I am cutting my spaces down and cutting my hourly program down a two thirds...which is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">scary</span> because I cannot keep up <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">with t</span>he demand now. My staff is stressed because we will be combining some rooms for the move and there are <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">a lot</span> of things up in the air. I can't blame them, at the same time I have no answers for them right now either, so I pray they can hang on for a while with the unknown. I have an awesome staff...and I think that there may only be four or five who hate me as opposed to the entire building...progress!<br /><br />I have 13 months left in my Masters program and honestly this program is easier than I thought it would be. However, because and I are both in school we often take turns driving to football games and other <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">activities</span> so the other one can do homework in the truck. Children's Ministry is great, although I took a break fro a while it seems that we are back on track and so is the rest of the ministry.<br /><br />I have come to the conclusion that we need a maid...because my kids already think we do! I am tired of cleaning up after grown people. I can clean all day Saturday and by Sunday evening they have trashed the place. I don't know how many times I can say the same dang thing...clean your room, get your stuff out of the front hall way, do your dishes, clean your bathroom, sweep the floor.....I can't take it any more...there people are ridiculous!<br /><br />So all of the above, combined with the things I have left out to protect the innocent (and my job) has made me understand that we may all be presented with a possible midlife crisis situation...HOWEVER it is how we respond to the situation that determines whether it will be later considered a crisis or a victory. It is a minute by minute decision making process...often painful. There are times I would like to walk out the front door and not look back. But when that thought occurs I need to dig deep and ask God to help me.....and eat some chocolate!<br /><br />So my friends if you find yourself at the end of your rope (although after talking to the Joint Base Master Chiefs wife Friday at the Sub Ball I am no where as close to the end of my rope as I will be once he takes a boat) dig deep and embrace the mind of Christ...because while we may be going crazy...God never did or will!Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-21174692913559611042011-03-01T22:29:00.001-08:002011-03-01T22:29:17.339-08:00OMG!!!! Did you ever have one of those days where if one more person made asked a stupid question...or made a stupid statement you thought you might lose your mind?<br><br>I am at the point where there are no real words to convey what I have to say. I feel like I should just shout out random thoughts. For example when an employee walks past my office late yet again...maybe I should yell in my loudest crazy person voice "YOUR LATE AGAIN!!!!" or maybe when they ask a question they already know the answer to I could say, "Do you want to retract that ridiculous question you asked or did you mean to sound that foolish?"<br><br>People refuse to take responsibility for the own stupidity....I'm ready to make them own up!<br><br>Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-2002177336386553962011-02-07T07:51:00.001-08:002011-02-07T07:51:51.217-08:00There are two people who want my job! There are two people who want my job...Their names are Everybody and Nobody!!!!<br><br>Lets start with Everybody. You see everybody wants my job... Or what they imagine my job to be. Those who think being in charge is glamorous really want my job. They think having business cards with their name on them and an office is where it's at. Then there are those who think that all decisions I make are wrong and they could make much better ones and make everyone happy. Let's not forget those who think being in charge equals no work and plenty of free time<br><br>Let's move onto Nobody. Nobody wants to have to answer the questions when the person who the business card was given to calls. When do do want this? Where do you want this? Are willing to pay for this? And oh! The work that goes on in that coveted office. The decisions that need to be made, the budget, staffing, schedule, the angry clients... The ones that were made angry by everybody and nobody that I have to deal with. The constant stream of emails and phone calls that need to be answered...the never ending stream of paperwork piles on the desk. The decisions that need to be made...you have to weigh the regulations, customer service, the welfare of the employee, the union, and what's best for the entire picture....not just nobody. Nobody always second guesses you and tells you that you could have made a better decision....and most of the time you were put in a position to have to make a decision by everybody and nobody....because they couldn't...or wouldn't take the risk! Finally...I work 13 hour days with no lunch....while everybody and nobody make sure they get a break, a lunch, and they punch out after their 8 hours...on the dot!<br><br>So to Everybody and Nobody....you really don't want my job...you couldn't handle my job!<br><br>Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-53225482163060833852011-01-20T20:08:00.001-08:002011-01-20T20:08:15.341-08:00Blogging from my phone... Ok so I downloaded this app to my iPhone to see if I could blog on the go...because let's gave it sometimes you just have to get it out there! This is a test run:-)<br><br>Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-8544681776717712922011-01-16T13:33:00.000-08:002011-01-16T14:04:29.742-08:00Here I am!<div>My husband came to me the other day and asked me if I knew the last time I blogged, was. I told him I thought it was sometime in the fall of 2009. In actuality it had been August 2009, right after I started working for the Army. He admonished me to start blogging again and I have to admit I really have missed it!</div><div> </div><div>So much has happened...I don't know where to begin. Some of it would be too painful to write about and some I am still trying to figure it out, so I'll cap the highlights and post some pictures:-)<br /></div><div>The biggest thing would that I turned 40, on October 13<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">th</span>. I am not one of those people who see tragedy or even loss at turning 40. Instead I see it as the next step in the journey I am on. I chose to celebrate the whole month by posting an 80's song of the day on facebook for each day of the month. We covered everyone from by beloved <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Bon</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Jovi</span> (who we saw in concert last February here in Honolulu:-)) to even my not so favorite Phil Collins. My husband and friends threw a surprise birthday party for me...with much help from my daughters. It was extremely comical to hear their tales about pulling the party together, without me finding out. I have decided that there are things that I want from life, and that now is the time to embrace and celebrate those things, so I look towards the next decades with <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">anticipation</span> and excitement.</div><div> </div><div>I also have moved from being a Training and Curriculum Specialist for the Army Child Youth and School Services to being a Director of one of their Child Development Centers. This center has given me some of the greatest struggles I have faced in my professional life, but also some of the greatest victories and joys. The ladies that work with me are amazing and make coming to work easy. I love what I do, I know I am walking in my calling and I am <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">grateful</span> to be where I am today.</div><div> </div><div>I am now a mother of three teenagers and one tween who still resides as the family Dennis the Menace</div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5562904297943038658" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 213px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic8ZHxN4TgcqUZT4h5N4FKtUzrbJBzzqvHRpNHHVj1q3n-USk1V0KBuh8p77foRYmxg4g62NPSFRLYgvCZtLaXKofz-FnciM-_e04nRQlZlFt4DI18VnCI0I8L8F7POT3UYFMica5PsTc/s320/family.jpg" border="0" /><br /><br /><div></div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5562904591632329746" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 238px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6SGb2Gxx3A7HBFftKIi0-spTNkJqJe-XpB8k6HlBeLDzhCkCj1jyFB0upfpjypiXBDfSWG2OwiEadPUaWMxFzQiPx8ertCQi8pUrHv_9TmRvCqQOPucVAueBzdYdkpsRY5afhTGOzfO0/s320/josh+2.bmp" border="0" /><br />In this picture we have from left to right <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Zachary</span> (12), Joshua (16), Becca (15 next week), and Britt (19 who they have started calling Midge...because she is the shortest out of all of them, except Zachary who is quickly gaining on her...Joshua is a whole foot taller than she is)<br /><br />We continue to spend all of our Friday nights and Saturday mornings from August to November at some sort of football field or another....with even Britt sporting the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Aiea</span> colors..<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">shhhh</span> don't tell those Campbell people. Britt is in her <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">sophomore</span> at Hawaii Pacific University, Joshua is finishing his Junior year at <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Aiea</span> High School, Becca her sophomore year, and Zachary is in his first year of junior high. Rick is wrapping up his Bachelors from Wayland University and I am still pursuing my Masters in Educational Psychology from Capella University.<br /><br />I feel we are coming to a time of transition in all areas of our lives....God is getting ready to do something amazing and something we could have never expected....above and beyond any of our expectations....and I am ready!Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-10200896842674111492009-08-20T00:37:00.000-07:002009-08-20T00:54:25.703-07:00Now That's An Idea....So, last night we really looked into Zachary's fish tank and realized that his goldfish have some how over night grew to proportions that makes me wonder what Zachary is feeding them. They have completely outgrown the 20 gallon tank they are in. Rick suggested <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">I cruise</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Craigslist</span> to see if anyone was selling a larger tank.<br /><br />So, this afternoon I cruised <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">through</span> the different headings looking for either a free or reasonable fish tank. When I stumbled across coin operated washing machines and dryers.....those of you who know me, also know that the first thing that crossed my mind was that I should buy them and install them in the garage for the kids to use.<br /><br />Think of the benefits....they would have to budget and schedule accordingly.....paying their own way. I would love nothing more for them to realize the value of the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Almighty</span> dollar.....they have no concept of money. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">I spent</span> close to $600 on groceries this past weekend and they still want to go to McDonald's on the way home.....how about you have a <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">McPeanut</span> Butter Sandwich...would you like some milk with that?<br /><br />And let me give you my opinion on public school...which I thought was suppose to be FREE......I have written more checks to the public schools for this and that in the last couple of weeks than I did when they were in private school....dang you <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">even have</span> to pay to ride the school bus here.<br />We pay lab fees, lunch fees,picture fees, football uniform fees....and I pay $6 a piece for us to get into the football games to watch my money run up and down the field getting jumped on. At Brittany's <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">alma mater</span>....they are so broke the athletes have to pay to get into their own game....that is crazy. The sad thing is that the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">athletic</span> departments in schools in Hawaii are fighting to <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">keep their</span> programs alive for the kids.<br /><br />So.....that brings me back to the coin operated washing machines and dryers...maybe I could open it up to the public and use the funds to help the local high schools pay for sports.....Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-14801053815820303652009-08-19T10:44:00.000-07:002009-08-19T11:01:59.909-07:00Time FliesWell.... as you can see I have been neglient in posting once again. I don't know where all my time goes.....<br /><br />Things around here have been interesting......<br /><br />Rick started shore duty at the beginning of August....after a few Griswold moments:<br /><br />First because he was waiting for orders before he re-enlisted they almost didn't let him re-enlist. Yes, that's right if PSD had their way he would be a civilian as I type. But thankfully, the Captain, XO, and the detailer put their foots on some rear ends and he was able to re-enlist on July 28th.....his contract expired on August 1...talk about cutting it close.<br /><br />Since he waited so long to re-enlist our ID's were due to expire...in two days. So I took the whole day off to get our ID's and new stickers for the truck. The kids and I head down to the PSD nice and early in the morning for our appointments. When we arrive we are told that the Deers system is down world wide. I tried to explain to the nice boy sitting behind the counter that, that would not do at all because our ID's expired THAT day.<br /><br />Now, let me interject here....I have had my ID for 20 years...I have spent more time with that card than I have my husband in our 20 year marriage...it lets me buy food, gas, whatever I need at a reasonable price. It is my ticket to the doctors, to get on base.....what am I going to do with out my ID.?!?!?!?!?!<br /><br />I called Rick on the boat and his solution was...for him to come down there....dude they don't give a rip what your rank is they cannot make the system work based on that...it is a WORLD WIDE problem!!!!<br /><br />So, at church a friend of ours told me to come to the Army office and Monday and he would do it without an appointment....which he did. I walked in and there were 20 people waiting...he told all them that I was important and he had to take care of me immediately...coolness!<br /><br />So, Rick and I have ID's...the kids have an appointment to get theirs Friday..Rick is taking them. He is not happy about it, but I have already wasted a day with his Navy system...now its his turn!<br /><br />So back to the transition to shore duty.....<br /><br />Three teens<br />One tween<br />One Senior Chief...who deals with men who act like children all day<br />One mom who has a plan that keeps everything afloat.....<br /><br />Its not priceless my friends...it is a hot mess. The first week was a nightmare. Rick really has never lived with teens and all that comes with it. The drama, the laziness, the constant having to remind them, the constant out stretched hand asking for money. But, I think things have settled down some...so hopefully I will have more time to write:)Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-13718256355084855052009-07-31T19:11:00.001-07:002009-07-31T19:11:24.191-07:00<img style="visibility:hidden;width:0px;height:0px;" border=0 width=0 height=0 src="http://counters.gigya.com/wildfire/IMP/CXNID=2000002.0NXC/bHQ9MTI*OTA5MjQ3MjIwMyZwdD*xMjQ5MDkyNjY5OTg*JnA9Mzg2MzYxJmQ9Jm49YmxvZ2dlciZnPTEmbz1mNWQyZmUxYjY4MGU*MzNlYjIyYzk3MTk4ZDYwOWFlOCZvZj*w.gif" /><img src="http://i123.photobucket.com/albums/o295/hibusymom/beccascamera511.jpg">Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-89316130593923456212009-07-27T19:33:00.000-07:002009-07-27T19:59:55.862-07:00I'm Alive:)As you can see I finally have made time to get <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Britts</span> graduation pictures uploaded. June 6<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> has came and went...and we all survived!<br /><br />My parents had a nice relaxing visit, my Dad did end up spraining his ankle, at the stadium for Britt's Grad. So he spent the last couple of days on Brittany's crutches. But it was good having them here.<br /><br />Soon after my parents left, we jumped right <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">into our</span> yearly Vacation Bible School preparations...even Rick went all out:) We had 76 volunteers and 99 children.<br />It was an amazing time of fellowship where God was lifted up. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">Forty</span>-five children gave their lives to Christ on Thursday evening!<br /><br />Unfortunately half way through the week this icky virus started sweeping through. My whole family ended up with it...except Brittany of course because she was not risking missing her trip to Virginia. We had it so bad we did not get dressed all of 4<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> of July weekend....we just showered and put clean pj's on:)<br /><br />Next came Brittany's Grad/Birthday party..yes she turned 18 on me...and yes there were more tears:) But we had a nice party at the pool and she enjoyed herself. She left the next day for Virginia to spend time with her other family.....The Browns:)<br /><br />Zachary has also started playing Flag football. He is pretty good and spends most of his time trying to convince us to let him play tackle....the jury is still out on that one! So we spend our Sunday afternoons at the football field:)<br /><br />Becca is anxiously awaiting the beginning of her freshman year, and enjoying dance and cheerleading.<br /><br />Joshua is still going to football practice everyday and his diligence has paid off, he will be playing first string wide receiver....this has me a little nervous, but I will leave him in God's hands.<br /><br />I have a new job...I just have no idea when I will start:) I will be a Training Curriculum Specialist for the Army at one of their <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">CDC's</span>. I am really excited. I love training and mentoring...and now I will be getting paid to do it all day long:) I will miss PATCH and the staff there but I am grateful for the opportunity God is giving me to use the gifts and talents He has given me!<br /><br />Drum roll <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">pleassssseeeeeee</span>....Wednesday Rick will re-enlist and then check off the boat, drive back to <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">subase</span> and check in at <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">SUBPAC</span>. I will tell you that this past three years of sea duty have been the longest of my life and when I say I thank God that we made it through them I say it with all sincerity and a multitude of gratitude!<br /><br />Thankfully, the raise I get from my new position will make up for the fond <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">farewell</span> to sea pay and sub pay...plus around another 10k a year.<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_10" class="blsp-spelling-error">I am</span> thankful I serve a God of addition and multiplication instead of subtraction and division!<br /><br />Finally, I am registered for school....I start my Masters in Educational Psychology on Sept 9<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_11" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span>, Britt starts her classes on Sept 8 and Rick the first week of October:)<br /><br />I believe that I am also going to write a devotional book for mom's....let me rephrase that for "real moms." You know who you are....you don't wear an apron....probably don't even own one, you ask God for strength to deal with your children more than once a day.....and you really want a devotion that will deal with the real issues of motherhood...like who are these aliens people keep referring to as my children?<br /><br />This devotional will hopefully be step one ...ok the blog was step one, step two in my writing career...its all about taking baby steps!Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-49524871208982228712009-07-27T19:30:00.001-07:002009-07-27T19:30:27.260-07:00<img style="visibility:hidden;width:0px;height:0px;" border=0 width=0 height=0 src="http://counters.gigya.com/wildfire/IMP/CXNID=2000002.0NXC/bHQ9MTI*ODc*ODEzODMyOCZwdD*xMjQ4NzQ4MjE2MzU5JnA9Mzg2MzYxJmQ9Jm49YmxvZ2dlciZnPTEmbz1hNDcwOTQ3NDdkZmY*M2ExYjA3MTQwZDllNGU2MzMwNiZvZj*w.gif" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" src="http://w123.photobucket.com/pbwidget.swf?pbwurl=http://w123.photobucket.com/albums/o295/hibusymom/7535c109.pbw" height="360" width="480">Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-27525504503439281342009-06-23T14:24:00.000-07:002009-06-23T14:34:01.690-07:00Catching up...AGAIN!!!<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Ok</span>, since I haven't blogged since Britt's <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">graduation</span> I <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">reallllyyyy</span> need to catch up!<br /><br />Let's start with me forgetting my parents at the airport!!! Well, I didn't really forget them...I just didn't think they were coming in on Wednesday....we all thought they were coming in on Thursday, including my brother who made the reservations for them. <br /><br />So here it is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">Wednesday</span> evening and I am finishing up some last minute details, like cleaning my bathroom, and washing the sheets <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">for</span> the bed my parents are going to sleep in...when the phone rings and its my dad. I ask him where he is and he tells me, "The airport." So I ask, "Daddy why are you at the airport at midnight? Your plane does not leave until 8am?" He replies, " I am at the Honolulu Airport!" <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Ooooppppppssss</span>!!! So I instruct my children to finish all the jobs I hadn't and jumped into the truck to go get my parents. I was bummed because I though they were flying in on Thursday evening, so I had just decided to work until they got there, so I had to go to work the next day. They just chilled out at home!<br /><br />Then came the mad dash to pick Rick up because the boat did a personal transfer and he was coming in late Friday afternoon. he ha<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">d just</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">enough</span> time to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">rush</span> home shower, change and head out the door...to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Alycea's</span> graduation. It was beautiful and I pretty much cried from the time we got in the car until I went to bed that night.<br /><br />The next day saw us running around for lei's and other items for the graduation ceremony, painting the windows on the truck, and juggling all those people into the cars.....<br /><br />I will stop here because Britt's graduation deserves a post all of its own.....so stay tuned...I'll be back by this weekend!Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4666642745220839886.post-73499023492285266442009-05-30T21:44:00.000-07:002009-05-31T09:44:12.431-07:00I Don't Think I Can Do This....I can't breathe...I can't do this.<br /><br />How am I suppose to sit in the stands and listen to them call her name next Saturday, listing all her accomplishments, and watch her walk across the stage and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">acc</span><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">ept</span> her diploma? How am I suppose to sit there and watch her?<br /><br />I remember like it was yesterday....searching for the right school for her, teaching her to write her name, shopping for her first school back pack, first lunch box.....dressing her for the first day of school.... I remember 9 years later laying in my bed crying and praying about her starting public high school....and now I have blinked and it is over...she will graduate.<br /><br />The past couple of months...well actually since OJ and Darius (get back to Darius in a minute) graduated last year Britt has been able to take me to levels of frustration that have mostly (smile) kept the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">unbreathable</span> moments that <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">I have</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">experienced</span> this week at bay. The lack of energy put into applying for scholarships, her dogged determination to decline the full ride scholarship, the lack of <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">mathematical</span> abilities when considering her future...and lets not even go into the 7 months it has taken her to get her room clean.<br /><br />But today as I am planning out what I have to do this week to get ready for my parents arrival and the graduation I can no longer put off the onslaught of emotions that <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">I am</span> feeling...what really doesn't help is that Rick is not here to hold me through it.<br /><br />Darius....yes...he is not helping me any either....you see he is going into the Air Force and I have to say good bye to him tomorrow.....so if you pass me on the street and I am crying uncontrollably anytime in the next two weeks....you will know why!Jill AKA busymomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16960307068449979881noreply@blogger.com1